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June 29, 2018 By Melendy Johnson

A Numbers Game

What do numbers mean to you

Numbers

What are these little things we see everywhere?

Numbers

They create a sense of accomplishment,

A sense of self

A sense of self worth.

Value

Place

Location

Numbers define our lives more than we realize.

Our income

Our debt

Our giving

They define our self

Our weight

Our height

Our clothing size

They define our home

How much

What area

How many rooms

They define our accomplishments

What place

What grade point average

How many followers we have

How many likes we get.

But why do we give numbers so much worth in our lives?

 

Because we learn to from the moment we are born. As a mother, I can remember the first questions I would be asked about my pregnancies. What is your due date? How far along? How many weeks? How long until you know the gender? How many are there? How many will you have? All of these questions require a value, a number.

Then, once you have your child, the first things people want to know about a baby are their height and weight. (Numbers)

Then time and date (numbers)

Then weeks/months/years (numbers)

How many words? (Numbers)

We are measured by numbers from the very beginning. We learn that these numbers hold value. They define who we are. People see us as the skinny or fat baby, the tall or short child, the rich or poor person based on numbers.

 

We try so hard to change these numbers. To make them different. To make them better. Being better or best means having the highest or the lowest number (depending on what you are talking about). Being better or the best means comparing yourself to others. We should always caution ourselves from being too quick to compare ourselves to others. When we do that to our children we can create a world of hurt.

As a mom, I often find myself saying that the first or the second or the third child did x, y, or z at such and such an age. Then, I find myself saying this to another parent when we compare our children. It is like a three ring circus of “well, my child was walking at 10 months old. How about yours?” And “Oh! Well, my child could read at the age of 2.” Followed quickly by an occasional, “Well, my child was playing Mozart at three.” And so on. It really makes me sad to think I have done that about and to my children. I Am trying not to do that anymore. I try to use names and their character to describe them, but sometimes that is hard in a society of numbers.

Motherhood and life are filled with so many numbers. At one point in my own life running seemed like a good idea. How hard could it be, right? So, I signed up for a 5K. I never practiced, never warmed up, and just showed up to run. I came in last place. It took me 47 minutes to run that 5K and it was the most grueling 47 minutes of my life. Those numbers have improved drastically over time with focus, practice, and dedication.

Why did that bother me? Because I let that get to me. I let those numbers give me value. I have learned that those numbers only hold value in that they pushed me to run faster and farther, and to understand that it takes practice to improve my running numbers.

As parents we wanted to choose a sport for our boys that would help them find their values: hard work, dedication, teamwork, good sportsmanship, etc.. The sport we chose for them is all about the numbers : track and field.Aaron Running

Talk about numbers, this sport is about how fast, what place, and how far. We chose it because the one thing I did learn from that race was that I could better myself from that time. Track & Field is a sport that doesn’t compare you to someone else. Well, it doesn’t if you do it right. As coaches and parents we are constantly telling our runners to do THEIR best. Not to worry about the other runner’s best, but to focus on what they can do to beat themselves. We push them in practice to stretch, run, jump and throw better every time. This dedication has lead to personal bests for many of our runners, and even a showing at the Junior Olympics.

The numbers here show our runners that they have grown. That their hard work is paying off. That dedication and focus will lead to great rewards. This lesson is not just for running or jumping or throwing, but it will play out in life.

If they focus on the task at hand, do what they have learned to do and dedicate themselves to it, they will find that they are capable of growing at any task.

Numbers. They mean so much, but also, so little.

Love yourself!A number can never compare to the worth a person feels inside. The sense of accomplishment and wonder someone feels as they rise above a challenge and grow from it. No number can ever replace that feeling.

So I challenge you. Move forward with fewer numbers. Credit yourself for what you can do, and find your non-number worth. What makes you fully you? How do you find your non-number worth? For me, it is how happy my children are, what they believe they can do, the joy in my marriage, and what I know I am capable of. Numbers do not need to define any of that!

be free to love yourself for you

Leave a comment and help others find ways to find their worth as well

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April 17, 2018 By Melendy Johnson

YouTube for Business – a beginners guide!

Do you want to explore the world of YouTube?

It has been something I was afraid of – but, I took the plunge, and I am so excited to be seeing how much fun YouTube is, and what a purposeful tool it is! I wanted to write this to help others who want to broaden their YouTube knowledge – and their reach by joining this channel!

 

YouTube business

First of all – the tools you will need.
I currently use
– My iPhone
– A tripod
– a ring light
– a neutral wall
– and the iMovie editing application

YouTube business

I start with an Idea. What do I think will add value to someone else and their day. Then I decide my level of knowledge in this area. I ask myself, can I answer this on my own, or do I need to add a resource?
Once this decision is made – I do my hair and makeup, get dressed in something professional , and get ready to record. YouTube is a public platform, and I therefore want to be sure to put my best me out there!

Then – I record – I take 10-15 minutes of video of me talking about or showing whatever I am trying to relate to my audience! If I misspeak – or want to not include something – I take a long pause, that way editing is easy. I even use the words – edit that – so that when I am editing I will remember my intention. I think one long video clip is way easier to edit than many short clips – but – whatever works for you is going to work for you!

After recording – I have a snack – and then comes the fun part – editing!
iMovie is super easy to use – and makes video editing seem super easy as well – here is a quick video with visual steps – not sure about sound – But – you can see my video edits, and the process here!

Once you are happy with your video – just save it in the largest file size you can. This is where I find having a home “Cloud” storage space is vital – it doesn’t have to live on my phone! here is an example of a YouTube video that I edited and added to my feed!

Then I upload to YouTube, and add descriptions that include links to my final destination for that video whether it be Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest or my Blog!

And no worries – If a week from now, you don’t love what you shared – make it private – tweak it until you do love it, and then re-share it!

What will your first project be?!

I cannot wait to see it!

See my YouTube Videos here!

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January 23, 2018 By Melendy Johnson

To Pinterest or not to Pinterest?

We have most likely all found Pinterest.

My mom uses Pinterest, My dad uses it, My husband is using it to finish our basement. I use it – for many purposes, but I often pin with no intention of actually using those pins. In the words of a friend – Pinterest is an Online Life – One we usually wish we had. Workouts we won’t do, outfits we won’t wear, drinks we won’t make, crafts that are too messy, and food we won’t cook. Reality is – we want to, but we won’t.
After hearing this, I decided to take action. I looked at my Pinterest boards, and found one workout that I thought I could do daily, and several recipes that I wanted to try.

I decided to Use my Pins to actually make some changes!

First – I decided to do a plank Challenge for my workouts – since Steve and I are cruising soon, I am very conscious of my waistline.   I am about 10 days in, and I am seeing and feeling some results. Let’s see where I land on Port day! I am also going to the Gym Daily and doing about 50 minutes of Cardio, combined with healthier eating – I am not down pounds yet, but inches are melting off! Yay for small successes!

Now for recipes

I found several Low carb recipes, and some even looked appetizing! I looked at our week, and I decided that with a low impact week, we were going to try these out. (Be on the lookout for how these went over the next few days!) Here are the recipes that I am in love with for this week.

Monday: – Spaghetti Squash and herb butter lobster!
Tuesday – Steak tips with Zucchini AuGratin
Wednesday – Spinach and Mozzarella Stuffed Chicken breast and Arugula salad

I will be back daily to update you on each recipe, and, what I would do differently!
Want to see the recipes I Pinned on Pinterest?
Follow me and my boards!
And be sure to check back here for how these recipes turned out!

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January 17, 2018 By Melendy Johnson

Self-ish or self care? You decide!

do it 2018Self care starts with realizing your worth.

In today’s society where we have everything at our fingertips we often feel a sense of needing to accomplish it all at once. Self care can often take a back seat to our lives. Sometimes we push ourselves to the bottom of the list.

We don’t drink enough water.

We skip the gym.

We eat fast food.

We don’t make the phone call.

We skip doctors appointments.

We ignore a symptom.

We don’t read the book.

Why do we do these things? Because we live in a world of right now, most important, have to be done tasks. We live in a place where we literally are never out of touch. There is nowhere to hide. Our phones are our portable offices, and we spend a lot of time feeling guilty about where we spend our time.

Stopping to take care of ourselves can be seen as selfish. Time at the gym while your husband/wife makes dinner, spending time on a hobby instead of answering an email, a night out with friends while your children stay with the in-laws. These things are hard to balance, and hard to explain to ourselves when the world around us says, be ready, get your work done, be available, everything is an emergency.

You know what- I want to change that name- it isn’t selfish, it is self worth.

We don’t drink enough water.    Your body needs water to function

We skip the gym. You body needs physical movement to keep working.

We eat fast food. Food is fuel. We shouldn’t deprive our bodies or feed it junk

We don’t make the phone call. Our relationships keep our emotional health happy.

We skip doctors appointments.  Regular visits with the doctor help us to be on top of our health

We ignore a symptom. Symptoms are a signal – we need to follow through.

We don’t read the book.  Books help us explore our world, our self, or escape reality for a moment of time.

The reality is that the guilt we feel when taking the time to do things for ourselves is placed there by how we think others feel about us. About or decisions, as parents, business people, athletes, lovers, women/men, daughters /sons,

Why do we care so much? The world we live in is a world that values our Social Media standing over our self worth standing. We need to take back self care – Go to the gym, read the book, go on the date, call your friends, listen to the symptoms, get your check ups, and even spoil yourself with a massage, your nails, your hair, whatever makes you feel better about you! Self care is so not selfish, and it is necessary for you to grow.

….

I challenge you to pick one piece of self care that you wish you had in your life right now, and then Set goals to make it a reality. Feel free to comment here to dd some accountability!

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August 15, 2017 By Melendy Johnson

8 minutes…

Today is the start of week 7 with my running coach – Week 7!

They say it takes 21 days to form a new habit – or to become adjusted to a new routine.

It took me 7 weeks – but running 3-4 times a week, this was my 21st run.

21 times I got up, put on my  “I don’t want to”
“Big Girl” shoes, grabbed my headphones, my playlist, my water, and my running plan.

21 times I did it.

8 Minutes – that is what I ran for today – my whole run was over half an hour, but I ran for 8 minutes straight –

Minute one – I’m not ready

Minute two – only 6 to go

Minute three – Maybe I cannot do this

Minute four – halfway there

Minute five – maybe I should have started slower

Minute six – two minutes to go…

Minute seven – one to go, that wasn’t so bad!

Minute eight – maybe I could have done 10!

and then there was the rest of the ladder.

But I ran for 8 minutes.

When I started this program 21 runs ago, I couldn’t run for one minute straight.

My progress may seem slow, but to me, it is exactly what I needed to do. my body is slowly changing, my waistline getting a little more definition, my abs a little tighter, loosing some of the roundness in my face.

What am I gaining?
Strength
Endurance
Confidence
Resilience
the ability to understand my splits and pace

courage

All things I was lacking before I started running.

I am so grateful that one Saturday morning my now coach took a chance and asked if I wanted to train with her. She asked if I wanted some guidance in my running. She led with value, and offered me the ability to find myself at my own pace. She sends reminders when it has been too long since I have run, and rejoices in my triumphs when I overcome an obstacle.

There are so many excuses I could have made – so many things I could have let get in the way yet 21 times I said yes, and today I rejoice in 8 minutes! Maybe tomorrow I will do 10.

~~~~~~~~

What do you want to make a new habit?

What are the excuses you tell yourself?

Go do it! Make that change for you!
Let me be your inspiration – and you go be mine!

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August 12, 2017 By Melendy Johnson

smile – when you need some humor in your day

Smile

Who doesn’t love a good laugh? I know I do.

Laughter can come from the most random places. A quick text from a friend, an accidental spill,  a look between you and your lover. Any of these can create a sense of happiness that bubbles from your toes to your mouth and explodes in a roar!
Today, I stopped and had several moments of laughter. I had been feeling a little down, and I decided to change that. So I said yes to the play date, and the text from a friend, and the customer who wanted a close up. I smiled more, thought less, and I decided that my happiness is up to me.
We have so much to be happy about, but sometimes the “musts” in life creep in, they stop you from being happy about life, because you are focused on the musts, you can’t see the do’s. As someone who has suffered with postpartum depression, anxiety, and self doubt, I know when these feelings of gluing myself to the chair and never leaving my house start to sink in that I need to smile or laugh, or just feel the sun on my face.

It is NEVER easy to get up and do the things you need when you feel down. For a week, I have felt down. For a week I have been unsure, and two days ago I told Steve. Talking is always the first step… Today, Today I finally got out, I didn’t make an excuse. I went out, talked to other moms, was honest about how I was feeling, had a good laugh, and came home happy again. I am in no way 100%, but, I made progress. I smiled. I don’t ever talk to others about the darkness that creeps in, just Steve.   I am learning how to seek out the medicine I need to get through it – connections.

funny texts

Tonight, a text from a friend, a mom talk during a play date, and a hug and a smile from my love brought me back.
What brings you back?
What helps you to be okay again? to step out of your funk?
for me – sunshine, and laughter.

How can I help you get through?

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August 11, 2017 By Melendy Johnson

Staycation – When I want to be a tourist

Have you ever Needed a staycation?
I have been back home from California for a week, but – I am feeling the need for some down time with the family!
Living in one of the best vacation destinations in the world (in my opinion!) means that sometimes we miss out on the paces and events that make our state special.
Sometimes it takes someone else showing us what we are missing for us to truly see it.
Every year my aunt and uncle travel from the middle of the country back to the Ocean State for a visit. This visit means that we get a chance to explore the Ocean State like we were tourists. With so much to explore in such a small state, the nice thing is you can decide each morning what you want to do!
There is  something about taking the day off, heading to the beach , and just enjoying time together that actually makes everything seem really amazing again. I love the fact that when they are  here we splurge on things like seafood and trips to Newport, and sometimes Maine. We take the time to pause, breathe,  look at the ocean and remember the reasons we live where we live.
I look forward to their visits every year. Having family that lives so far away is hard when the closest airport to them costs us about $1000 per person to visit, it seems out of reach. The fact that they are drawn to the Ocean, back home, and that we can see them and enjoy their company makes it worth so much more than any airfare could be. I live in a state where I am no more than 30 minutes from the Ocean no matter where I am, and I have not visited the beach yet this summer!! I long for their visits because I get to come home too, see the state I love, and be a part of their home coming too.
 Rhode Island
What do you love about where you live?
What would you do if you were a visitor in your own state?
What would you miss?
What is keeping you from getting out and exploring like a tourist?
Go do it!

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August 7, 2017 By Melendy Johnson

how a dress changed my life…

We all have that one outfit – The one we love the most. you know the one – The outfit that when you wear it – you run the world!
For me – This is the dress. You see, this dress is the one I was wearing the day i decided to join LuLaRoe. It fits me perfectly, and is covered with the most amazing floral pattern. My grandmother had the best garden, and when I wear floral, I feel like I am close to her.

Isn’t it funny how something like a flower on a dress, or a whiff of perfume can bring you back to a moment. My grandmother was in love with fashion, she owned hundreds of shoes and had closets filled with clothes. Her costume jewelry collection was astounding, and her real jewelry was very well cared for. A true southern belle, she was always well put together. I always wanted to be that way.

As a little girl I would get dressed up with gloves and hats. I was also really good at being a Tomboy though. I was never afraid to get dirty, and I often wonder how my grandmother felt about that. I wanted nothing more than to fit in, be beautiful, and love who I was. As the teenage years began, I started to realize, I didn’t love me. That “Unlove” of myself lasted a long time. I questioned friendships, lovers, adults. I did not believe I was worth loving. The one I cared about the most was my Gram.

Reaching into adulthood, being a wife, a mom, and never finding me in any career was so hard. Then – A dress – this dress, and I felt comfortable – beautiful – confident. This confidence led me to a decision that changed my life. The rest is history, but this dress, it brings me back every time.

What draws you in? what creates memories for you? how do you use it to strengthen your present?

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August 7, 2017 By Melendy Johnson

Be proud of who you are, and what you do

Proud to Edit to add – I have since left my LuLaRoe business. I loved what I did, but had some family issues that left me unable to maintain the level of business we were at. The premise of this article rings true – what ever you do – have pride in who you are and how hard you work!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When you were a child do you remember getting a sticker on your paper? Or a smiley face drawn on by the teacher? How did you feel? You were proud! As we get older, we are taught to be humble, to be kind, and not to boast. Is it truly boasting though if you are doing something that makes you feel good?

track
Steve and I had the experience of coaching some amazing athletes at track and field this season. It is always pride filing to watch these youth go from fear to belief in themselves. We give them the tools to do what they have the physical ability to do, and they soar. Several of our athletes qualify for the National level of the Junior Olympics this year, and it was humbling. The biggest thing we did as a team was to win a local meet. This meet is regional and teams from all over the area come to compete. It was exciting to watch our athletes reach PR’s, do things they hadn’t before, and be proud of their work!

In our day to day life – we work our LuLaRoe business together. We are having much success, and enjoy the work that we do. Why is it that I have a hard time talking about this success? I want others to know that this woman who disliked everything about herself a year ago has found out how to love herself because of the work she is doing with LuLaRoe. I found myself “Turtleing” when people ask what I do, or how it is going. You know – when you pull your head into your neck and round your shoulders.

I don’t do that anymore – or at least I try not to. It turns out that the sales figures I have, and the work I am doing puts me in the top 1% of the company. I didn’t know that, I assumed I was average, I assumed others were doing it the same or better. you know what they say about assumptions.  I was setting personal PR’s, but I was also creating a sustainable business and keeping it to myself. That helps no one!

lularoe retailer

Today I am making a change. I am choosing to be proud of the work I am doing, and to share that with others. Someone else could benefit from my success story, and I don’t want to take that away from them.
So I will share. I will tell people about my success, and what the benefit is for my family, because I can do this, and stay humble, and possibly change a life all at the same time.

What can you share? How could it help someone else? Will you share?

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July 24, 2017 By Melendy Johnson

Never have I ever…a Tale in courage and anxiety

Let’s play a game –

It’s called Never Have I Ever –

Usually this is a drinking game where you take a drink every time someone says something they have never done that you have. For the purposes of this exercise, lets do 1 burpee for every item you have done that I haven’t.

Never have I ever – traveled alone

Never have I ever – gone on a work trip

Never have I ever – been away from my children for a long period of time

Never have I ever  – stayed at a hotel alone

This coming week – I will get to do a burpee for all of those -and it is scary… exciting and scary.

I have already tackled obstacles one and two so that is something to be okay with!

Obstacle one – getting tickets and reservations – Way back in the beginning of April  I was able to get a ticket to the LuLaRoe annual Convention. I was at a point where I was stepping up my business, and working towards being a better business owner. I knew that this convention would be a game changer for me, so I had to go, and Steve supported me fully.

The months have rolled on, and always in the back of my min was obstacle two – what to pack!!! How do you dress for a fashion event filled with like minded clothing obsessed ladies! I spent a few months putting the clothes I thought I would bring into a laundry basket in the corner of my room. It was something constantly buzzing in the corner of my mind for the last few weeks, so the fact that I am packed is a stress relief. not completely, but it helps!

That one was hard –

The past week I have been really focused on obstacle three – my our business while I am away! I have monthly sales goals set for myself, and I am close to them this month, but I leave Tuesday… Unfortunately my dream of going for the week and leaving Steve to enjoy the boys is turning into leaving Steve to make a few sales! I know he can, I know he will, but the plan didn’t work the way I wanted, and that is ok!

The most important obstacle, obstacle four – my family. Steve travels for business a lot. I do not. I have never traveled alone, haven’t flown in 5 years, and well, I have Never used a ride service (not a taxi or a ride share, maybe a bus and a train!) I don’t know how to be away from my family. The look in Aaron’s eyes said it all yesterday. He asked how many minutes to where I was going…my heart sank – he doesn’t know. So I showed him California on my map, and then said do you want to see Rhode Island? his eyes welled with tears and took a big gulp. “When will you be home?” I am gone for a week but we can talk every day! “Ok, will you be awake when we are asleep?” for some of it! “Ok” and off he went to play. I hope he can hop off to play on Tuesday when he wakes up and I am on a plane…”

I am sure there will be other obstacles, but I don’t leave until Tuesday AM. We have some time to overcome them.

I end this game of Never -Have -I – Ever with this question – What have you never done that you wish you could do? What are your obstacles? Are you willing to do to overcome them and take on your Never?

 

My challenge to you – Go do it!
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Hello!

Welcome! I am so excited to share all things life with you! Recipes, fashion, workouts, relaxation, packing lists - you name it - I love it! I am a mom to three teenage boys, and a wife to my best friend. I coach youth track and field, and teach preschool. Life is always busy, and always fun here! Join in and share the fun!
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