Lifestyle with Melendy

a mom sharing her Recipes, Inspiration & Life

life

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A princess in running shoes…if only for a weekend


Flashback to October of 2018

Me: hey – what do you think about me doing the Disney Princess AHlf Marathon Weekend fairytale Challenge?

Steve: um – What?

Me: I mean it – I want to train and go. Some of my friends will be running, and I want to do it.

Steve: Are you going to train for it?

Me: duh – of course I will! (I hope)

Steve: you know what sure – Happy Anniversary! (Buys plane ticket and race ticket)

Me: Thank you so much!!! I am so going to do all the things and make you proud!! Maybe even PR

Steve: you better train for this! 

Me: of course!

Life: (snickering in the background…) Hold my beer

Well – that’s how it felt. I started training with a few walk/run/walk training sessions, and my back started spasming. BAD. And I couldn’t walk. So I started PT, and I was ready to start running, and then, our family had a tragedy – I am not going to share the details – they aren’t mine to share. I will say that our oldest got sick, and needed hospitalization for a time, and I could’t train through it. He is and will be ok. I just couldn’t train – and it showed.

Here I was two weeks out from the race – with maybe 15 total miles of training under my belt. BUT I had made some huge lifestyle changes. Sleeping better, drinking more water, eating a little bit healthier. Not anything earth-shattering, or unobtainable – just the subtle changes. 

So race weekend comes.I stepped on a scale the day before I left – the HEAVIEST I HAVE EVER BEEN in my life – even with all the changes. 

I walked up to the starting line of the 10K feeling like an imposter. 

Was I pretending to be someone I wasn’t anymore? Could I really do this? What was I thinking?

Then – a video came on about the Children’s Miracle Network – the hospital charity that the Disney races work with. And the emotions of the past year came flooding in. 

I was openly sobbing at the start line, and people were noticing. A woman who was near me put her hand on my shoulder, and said – you can do this – and you will. I was so afraid that I was letting others down – I forgot that the person I was running for was me. 

The only person I would let down is myself. 

I would do this. 

I could do this.

And you know what?

When I flipped the script – I did.

The 10K was easier. 

I really love the 10K distance. Long enough to feel like an accomplishment – but you don’t feel like your legs weigh a million pounds after. 

I was able to run (jog)-walk- run(jog) the whole race. There was fun music, people cheering each other on, and the fun of running through the Epcot countries, and the Boardwalk/Yahtch/Beach walkway. The drum line at the end gave a good beat and helped me to want to move faster – be stronger. I was 8 minutes off of my PR Time, and grateful that I didn’t push too hard. 

The half was a completely different story. 

I was ready mentally – I thought, but- I knew physically it would be a battle.

I started really strong – probably way too fast – but strong. There was a pacer in front of me – and they were doing 30 seconds run – 30 seconds walk. I stayed with them for the first 2 plus miles – that is 28 minutes of pacing that helped me start the race and helped me to finish.

I stopped between mile 2 and 3 to help a woman who fell – and probably broke her ankle. we called for medics – got her off the course – and they eventually told me to go. so I started running again – without the pacer group – and just followed along as others were run/walk/running their way to the castle!

I was still smiling here because I was just shy of the 10k mark. After the 10K mark – we were on our way back to Epcot. It was a long road- with very little spectators, and it was getting hotter. I had my headphones – my new playlist – and I was just trying to run/walk/run as much as I could. I knew I was close to the 16 minute per mile mark, and I needed to just keep moving.

I started to taper off at mile 9. That was my wall. I got up the hill to mile 11 and just cried, I didn’t think my body would make it. I honestly almost quit. but then I remembered that at the other end was a group of women who pushed me to be here – who believed in me – and I could do 2 more miles. I cried through it – but – at 28 minutes longer than my first half marathon – I finished.

Running for me has always been about personal accomplishment. I ran these races for me – but I also ran these races for my dad – who gave me the running bug – my family who believed in me – and my athletes who I believe in. Also – for the women at the finish line. What do you do for you?

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A Year in the making…aka fighting through the tears

People often post what a difference a year makes. But – it isn’t until you experience such a year that you truly understand how a year can change everything. 

It isn’t so much the dates, the travel of time, but rather, the collection of events that make up that year. 

One year ago today, I was just returning home from travel. I had gone on a one week cruise, and then the day after returning from that, I had driven to South Carolina by myself for a training for my business a the time. I then drove over night by myself to get home, and was awake for 25 hours – I don’t recommend this. 

So of course, on the Monday when I was feeling ill, I assumed I had caught a bug. I upped my fluids, took some vitamin C, and went to bed early. The next morning I woke up with a fever. Not a large one – or so I thought. 

When my body was shaking, and my neck was so stiff I couldn’t turn my head, I knew I needed to panic – a little. 

I went to the doctor, and turns out I had a fever of 103- too high for an adult. And the combination of fever, stiff neck, and overall malaise led me to earn a trip to the ER. When I waited for 4 hours with chills to be seen. 

2 failed spinal taps, more blood draws than I remember, 3 MRI, one MRA, and several doctors later. I left the hospital with a diagnosis of A-Septic Meningitis. 

11 days in patient, in a bed, unable to move takes more of a toll on your body than you realize. 

I had a walker, and had PT to relearn how to walk. I had zero balance or stability for the first few weeks. It took 2 months – but I was almost back to normal walking at that point. and as a runner – this was hard to deal with.

I dove back in to coaching my track and field athletes, teaching little minds at the preschool, cooking food for my family, and closing my business. Before it was even a thing – I Marie Kondo’d my life. 

The after ripples are there. My memory still isn’t 100%, and every once in a while I have a tremor in my weakened right hand, and I have one more follow up with the neurosurgeon to be sure the “bent vein” in my brain is not an Aneurysm. Those things are so trivial compared to where I was one year ago. I was telling my family my wishes, loving my children, and having long talks with my husband about what I wanted for each of them. I DO NOT remember most of my inpatient stay – just bits and pieces sewn together like a movie on the silver screen. 

I was so discouraged, but then so hopeful. Medication started to work, PT made me stronger, and I had a fighting spirit in me to do more – to be more – to help others do the same. 

Today – one year later, I am in possession of 3 medals from two races this weekend. One for the 10K I ran on Saturday, and one for the Half Marathon I ran on Sunday – the other – a medal for completing the challenge of running both races. 

These races weren’t easy, and they definitely don’t define all of me – but – they did remind me how much I love to run – how good I feel when I complete a race – and the camaraderie of runners. As I defined on Facebook hours after the race – A runner is a different breed of human. 

A year of fighting with my body – working through the pain and the tears – being unabashedly selfish. Doing the things I needed to do for me, my family, my health – to be sure we have the time together we want to have – those are the things I have done to make things better for us. 

For me

Because it wasn’t until months later I truly realized that I almost died – and through almost dying – I realized the things that made me want to live – that I live for – that bring me Joy – and I made room for them.  All of them. 

I intend to keep running – and find a way to make my running mean more for others – sharing this story is a huge part of it. 

Want to hear about my races – find those here:

And – today – I am signing up for 2 more races – and will be completing this race again next year! Want to join me? stay tuned!

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Surviving

Author note – I wrote this a year ago – and I was afraid to hit publish who am I to talk about survival – but – I did survive – I am publishing today as a part of the story I tell a year out – A look at my fresh memories here – and the recent Memories here -also – a look at who I am here – 

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The other side of Survival…

As a mom, heck as a woman, often times we get ill, and don’t do anything about it.
We think to ourselves it is just a cold, or the flu, or upset stomach and we do nothing about it. Sometimes- we don’t even do the resting we need to fully recover.
In February of this year(2018), I was blessed with an amazing month of travel. It started with the LuLaRoe Cruise. 7 nights on a ship with my husband, and so much training for my business. It was a dream vacation, and I loved every minute of it!
Then I got home, and drove from Rhode Island to South Carolina, for the Facebook Live Sale training that LuLaRoe offered. I drove there to save money, and drove home rather quickly.
I say all this to preface the “I am just tired/rundown/its the flu” that lead up to my very serious illness.

FULL DISCLOSER – My illness was not caused by this travel.

I got home from South Carolina, and I still had mild vertigo from the cruise. Then I gathered a headache, then I started to get a stiff neck…then the fever. I assumed it was the flu. So- the Monday feeling was- I just need a nap and more fluids, It must be the flu…
Tuesday morning was when the neck stiffness started, and it just got worse, so – by noon I called the doctor, made an appointment, and went in. For some reason I packed a bag – Just clothes, headphones, chargers, and toiletries. I guess I always pack a “just in case” bag. Deep down I was scared.

My doctor took my temp, and said – you aren’t going home…the rest is a blur… 9 days inpatient, MRI, MRA, Ct, X-ray, 2 Spinal Taps, Gallons of blood (or so it felt), crappy hospital food,  basic TV, missed Track events, hours alone, 3 days of isolation, Home with a walker, and home confinement,  no driving,  4 meds,  learning how to walk, trying to be a mom, rebuilding my business, self care, and being a wife, a friend, a sister, a daughter…I almost died…

I almost died…

That is the hardest thing to think about – because to me – I was just in pain. As each scan happened, incidental things would show up, blood work had a few flags. Nothing scary came back – in the end – Meningitis – which would have killed me if I had stayed on the couch and believed it was just the flu.

Now I don’t write this to scare you – but to talk about how surviving this scary ordeal was something I had to embrace. I had to admit I was sick, Admit I needed help, Go through the scans, and tests, and USE the freaking walker, and Allow all of our friends and family to bring us food, and I had to follow doctors orders and rest. For a month I was in bed by 6, and walking up and down the stairs was exhausting. I am now just over two months into recovery – two months into my new life, and I have discovered that survival, recovery, listening, take time.

My mindset was “It isn’t cancer. or It isn’t an aneurysm, or it wasn’t a car accident…But the reality is – I had to accept that I was sick, that I survived, and that I am in recovery.

What have you survived, and how did you recover?  What would you suggest to others to help them cope?

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To Pinterest or not to Pinterest?

We have most likely all found Pinterest.

My mom uses Pinterest, My dad uses it, My husband is using it to finish our basement. I use it – for many purposes, but I often pin with no intention of actually using those pins. In the words of a friend – Pinterest is an Online Life – One we usually wish we had. Workouts we won’t do, outfits we won’t wear, drinks we won’t make, crafts that are too messy, and food we won’t cook. Reality is – we want to, but we won’t.
After hearing this, I decided to take action. I looked at my Pinterest boards, and found one workout that I thought I could do daily, and several recipes that I wanted to try.

I decided to Use my Pins to actually make some changes!

First – I decided to do a plank Challenge for my workouts – since Steve and I are cruising soon, I am very conscious of my waistline.   I am about 10 days in, and I am seeing and feeling some results. Let’s see where I land on Port day! I am also going to the Gym Daily and doing about 50 minutes of Cardio, combined with healthier eating – I am not down pounds yet, but inches are melting off! Yay for small successes!

Now for recipes

I found several Low carb recipes, and some even looked appetizing! I looked at our week, and I decided that with a low impact week, we were going to try these out. (Be on the lookout for how these went over the next few days!) Here are the recipes that I am in love with for this week.

Monday: – Spaghetti Squash and herb butter lobster!
Tuesday – Steak tips with Zucchini AuGratin
Wednesday – Spinach and Mozzarella Stuffed Chicken breast and Arugula salad

I will be back daily to update you on each recipe, and, what I would do differently!
Want to see the recipes I Pinned on Pinterest?
Follow me and my boards!
And be sure to check back here for how these recipes turned out!

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Do It 2018 – Words of Inspiration as we look forward

In 2018 – I am looking forward to using my word (or rather, phrase) for the year, and it starts today. My phrase is “Do it”. Over the last year I have developed this blog with the help of others. I have built my business to a point where Steve and I will enjoy the LuLaRoe Cruise in February. Challenged myself to step out of my comfort zone on many occasions, met new people. I  learned a new instrument, began a running regiment that I have mostly maintained, and accepted that my weight loss journey is going to be one that takes more than a few trips to the gym and an occasional salad. I have done a lot in the last year that I would have never done, but I still held back.

For 2018, my goal is to do more. Plan appropriately, but DO more. When I question if I should do something or not, I ask myself 3 questions now –
1-Do I WANT to do it? If I don’t want to do it, I won’t do it.
2-Is this beneficial to me, my family, others, or my business? If I spend my time doing things that aren’t beneficial, I wont feel fulfilled, and I will stop doing those things.
3-Am I willing to commit the (time/talent/energy/focus) that this adventure/project/training/group deserves? I do not want to commit to something and be half in. I want to be all in, Otherwise, I am not giving my best, and that isn’t how I want to be known.

So, I took some time, and I researched some motivational quotes to help me through this new year. Each one spoke to me for a different reason, but the resounding theme was the same – DO IT!  I intend to print them and post them in my office space, I want to see the visual reminders of what I intend to do this year.  Let’s discuss each for a moment!

“Well done is better than well said.” Benjamin Franklin – How true is it that your actions speak way louder than your words. I would much rather be known for what I DO and how you feel around me than for what I said – or someone said I said. I want to be intentional with my actions this year!

“We are what we repeatedly do.” Aristotle. Habits take 21 days to create – and can be broken in the same. If I am not repeatedly doing the things I want to do to better myself, my business, or my family, then they aren’t going to become a habit. being intentional about my actions will create the habits I want to form!

“By Failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail” – Benjamin Franklin. Setting forth a plan of action, and doing my best research, due diligence, and preparation means that I have a better chance of being successful. Often times I am either 9 million hours of planning and no action, or zero planning and failed action. My intention is to find balance between those lines to create more intentional and better actions.

 

“Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four Sharpening the Axe.” Abraham Lincoln. preparation is good – bust focused attention to the best tools for the task at hand only makes the job easier. Sometimes it is easy to dive forward and want to just do, but I need to remember that proper preparation, planning, and use of my tool box will create an easier job in the long run.

“The most effective way to do it, is to do it.” – Amelia Earhart. I have been focused on my actions. Writing intentionally, scheduling posts so that I am ready for the day ahead, following up with friends, family, group members whom I know I need to follow up with. Setting up a plan for the future. All the planning in the world won’t make it happen. Only actions can do that!

And finally,  My word/phrase for 2108 – ready for me to not let fear take a hold. Ready to dive in. My original graphic has the phrase – ‘Fear is the Thief of dreams’.  I love that subtitle because- it is true! Being afraid causes us to pause, to freeze, to not do. So, in order to rise, to grow, to cultivate my new me, my new business goals, my new dreams, I need to let go of fear – And – DO IT!

So, What are you doing this year? What are you looking forward to with hope. How do you want 2018 to end? In order to know our path, we need to know our destination. Follow me here as I dive into this year of doing more, and worrying less. Are you with me? Share your word/goals for this year so that we can move forward together!

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Staycation – When I want to be a tourist

Have you ever Needed a staycation?
I have been back home from California for a week, but – I am feeling the need for some down time with the family!
Living in one of the best vacation destinations in the world (in my opinion!) means that sometimes we miss out on the paces and events that make our state special.
Sometimes it takes someone else showing us what we are missing for us to truly see it.
Every year my aunt and uncle travel from the middle of the country back to the Ocean State for a visit. This visit means that we get a chance to explore the Ocean State like we were tourists. With so much to explore in such a small state, the nice thing is you can decide each morning what you want to do!
There is  something about taking the day off, heading to the beach , and just enjoying time together that actually makes everything seem really amazing again. I love the fact that when they are  here we splurge on things like seafood and trips to Newport, and sometimes Maine. We take the time to pause, breathe,  look at the ocean and remember the reasons we live where we live.
I look forward to their visits every year. Having family that lives so far away is hard when the closest airport to them costs us about $1000 per person to visit, it seems out of reach. The fact that they are drawn to the Ocean, back home, and that we can see them and enjoy their company makes it worth so much more than any airfare could be. I live in a state where I am no more than 30 minutes from the Ocean no matter where I am, and I have not visited the beach yet this summer!! I long for their visits because I get to come home too, see the state I love, and be a part of their home coming too.
 Rhode Island
What do you love about where you live?
What would you do if you were a visitor in your own state?
What would you miss?
What is keeping you from getting out and exploring like a tourist?
Go do it!

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how a dress changed my life…

We all have that one outfit – The one we love the most. you know the one – The outfit that when you wear it – you run the world!
For me – This is the dress. You see, this dress is the one I was wearing the day i decided to join LuLaRoe. It fits me perfectly, and is covered with the most amazing floral pattern. My grandmother had the best garden, and when I wear floral, I feel like I am close to her.

Isn’t it funny how something like a flower on a dress, or a whiff of perfume can bring you back to a moment. My grandmother was in love with fashion, she owned hundreds of shoes and had closets filled with clothes. Her costume jewelry collection was astounding, and her real jewelry was very well cared for. A true southern belle, she was always well put together. I always wanted to be that way.

As a little girl I would get dressed up with gloves and hats. I was also really good at being a Tomboy though. I was never afraid to get dirty, and I often wonder how my grandmother felt about that. I wanted nothing more than to fit in, be beautiful, and love who I was. As the teenage years began, I started to realize, I didn’t love me. That “Unlove” of myself lasted a long time. I questioned friendships, lovers, adults. I did not believe I was worth loving. The one I cared about the most was my Gram.

Reaching into adulthood, being a wife, a mom, and never finding me in any career was so hard. Then – A dress – this dress, and I felt comfortable – beautiful – confident. This confidence led me to a decision that changed my life. The rest is history, but this dress, it brings me back every time.

What draws you in? what creates memories for you? how do you use it to strengthen your present?

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when the run seems so far away…

I recently decided that If I am going to coach track, I need to be running.
I can run, I do it, It is just not consistent.
So, I did what every normal crazy person does –
I hired a running coach, and signed up for a 10K.
That is what normal people do, right?
I love my coach
She gets me
Her first email to me was all… “and you are a mom, and a wife, and you own a business, and sometimes your workouts are going to get pushed aside, and we have to be okay with that…”
After reading that, I went out and bought new running shoes, a whole mess of LuLaRoe running pants (because they are awesome) some new bras – you know – the essentials! And I started out all super excited…
Week three was last week…
I got 2 of my 4 workouts in – ouch –
and truthfully – I should be running right now.
but –
the list
the lists of things that are so important they can’t wait
the promises we make ourselves
the things that are more important than the run
these things add up
and the run seems so long – who can do 50 minutes of running?
and I have to breathe, and remember that I can
I can and I have –
The choice to run is mine – it is for me – I need the mental break
my family wants me to do it.
Steve went for his run, and so should I
the run seems so far…but look how far I’ve come!

so I ran…

 

What seems so far for you? the run? the diet? the book? the degree? what are you waiting for? what is holding you back from moving forward? what is on your most important list?
because “when everything is (most) important then nothing is.” – Patrick Lencioni

let’s take the time to refocus, and set goals!
just run
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