Melendy & Steve

Corraling the Kids and the chaos while running our business

Melendy Johnson

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Instagram Course

Do you use Instagram for business? Or even for your personal life? Do you want to be an influencer or even close to one? (Who doesn’t,  right?)

I have to say it is one of my favorite platforms for connecting with others. Everyday people posting beautiful photos of the life they are living. Sharing stories of their daily lives. Building relation ships with others based on what our daily lives look like.

Instagram was very foreign to me at first. My posts were random, not connected, and sometimes – re-posts of what others had posted. I did not fully understand the small minutia of Instagram. Then, I took an amazing video course offered by Sassy Suite. This course teaches hashtag strategy, content strategy, and how to use Instagram to connect with others. I love that the content is updated regularly and that you can use it to grow your presence on Instagram.
Sassy Suite Instagram video course

As a person who utilizes Instagram every day to share, find, and collaborate on content, I found this course to be perfect for my business.
I am currently blogging, creating content for other educators, and helping to lead a group of women towards better health of their mind, body, and spirit. I am finding so much information on IG, and utilizing the skills I learned to help others.

Through this community I have found fellow runners who push me to keep moving. I can watch as my Track and Field athletes move on to high school, and see their successes. We are able to support our fellow #interentbesties, and watch others rock their business. The tribe of supporters, and supporters I have on IG is like a family, and I am so grateful for the lesson I learned to grow that tribe!

Have you tried this course?
Do you utilize Instagram daily?

Share you experiences with me here!

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recharge…or rebuild

recharge…

How tired are you?

Do you find sleep to be restful – or do you wake up longing to head back to bed?

Are you getting the recharge you need to be ready to face the day?

For many people I know, they aren’t rested.

I am guilty. I was not going to bed until midnight or later. Reading one last chapter, sending that email, making lists of “to do” items for the days ahead. I was having a hard time falling asleep, and then, I would hit the pillow, and it felt like I bounced off of it to start the next day. I felt like a zombie. I cannot even blame my children as they are all old enough to sleep through the night, and need to be dragged out of bed in the morning.

I realized something had to change. I had a shorter temper, and zero tolerance for bullshit. I wasn’t able to focus, my memory was lacking, and I just did not feel like myself. I needed to rebuild my sleep habits, and I knew it.

I started doing a few things to help me get more rest – and I hope they will be helpful for you. Please remember I am not a doctor – and none of my advice is medical – but remember to utilize your healthcare provider when you are concerned about your health.

The obvious number one: Go to bed earlier. There are nights that I am “in bed” at 8:30. I am not sleeping at that time, but, I am doing my bedtime routine. I clean my face, change into nightclothes, and spend the next hour or so making my lists, sending the emails, and then, drinking a glass of water. I do have a TV in my room. I often watch a new show in bed so that I stay alert for it, and then, turn it off.

Number 2: I set alarms. A lot of them. Not a 5:00, 5:01, 5:02…but a series of alarms all labeled with what I should be doing at that time. This has kept my mornings in routine. I am leaving the house with my list complete, and ready to teach my students for the day without concern.

Number 3 – I say no to things that will interfere with my time. This one took some time to realize. I was running my self ragged with a to do list for others, and not remembering to do for myself. I make sure that saying yes to something for someone else doesn’t mean a no to myself. Sometimes it means saying no to staying up.

Steve and Me after our most recent couples trip.

Number 4 – plan vacations. It is easier said than done. I make sure we have relaxing family, couples, and individual time off. I want to be sure we have a countdown to when we get to put our “lives on hold” and just be together. We sometimes do Disney, or a beach. Well- we usually do Disney cruise or Disney hotel even at the beach because 10 years ago we invested in the Disney vacation Club – and this way we have a “paid for” hotel for at least a week every year.

Number 5 – I do not stop myself from trying new things, or having things I love. If you say no to yourself, you only make yourself sad. This doesn’t mean I go hog wild doing everything – but, I do say yes to myself often, within reason. I also reach out to a few very close friends to talk through ideas I have. Having a good- trustworthy friend or two who doesn’t judge you- but will call out your bullshit is super important! Thanks Jaci!

my favorite chair – the clocks remind me there is always time for anything important.

Most importantly – do what works for you. Find a way to recharge. Go on a run, read a new book, go on a date, take a bath, drink the glass of wine, see the movie. Whatever way you recharge – make sure you put it on your to do list!

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Filter not…

Filter: noun – a porous device for removing impurities…

Have you ever been driving. Looked out at the sun painting a gorgeous canvas on the sky as it starts to settle beneath the horizon? You stop to grab a picture, roll down the window, and when you lower your sunglasses to look at the photo the colors are gone?

Then you realize that you have been seeing this through your sunglasses. Your $16 Target branded polarized glasses – almost literally rose colored! What you thought you saw was a sea of vibrant color dancing through the sky is a just as beautiful less vibrant picture of beauty.

Yes – I took this photo through my sunglasses.

We often see a lot of life this way though, don’t we? That best friend’s Facebook page where everything is perfect. The actress you admire’s Party for her daughters 2nd birthday complete with a circus. The athlete who runs every race and mile with a smile on their face.

When these things are around you every day you start to doubt your worth because of others success. Maybe you stop doing something you love because you aren’t enough. For me, it was blogging. I loved putting word on paper (and eventually computer) and sharing it with the world. I knew my readers were few, but I didn’t write for them, I wrote for me at first. This blog is actually my third. I have been writing for years.

At one point I had a piece I really loved, and I auditioned to read it in a women’s blogging forum. I was told it was a worthy piece. It was one that spoke to my heart, and It stung so bad when I didn’t get chosen. My writing stopped. I let the lens of “you are only a good writer if you get to speak” take over my confidence that I am a good writer.

It took me 2 years to write again.

Now I am writing about the things I want to. Increasing my Social media presence to grow my readers, and deciding that I am not only a good writer – I am worthy of being a writer.

Filtering out impurities isn’t always a bad thing, but, when filter impurities out means they flow in- into your head/heart/sense of self – that is when we need to discover a better way to filter. Had I not discovered a better filter for my self worth – I never would have worn this dress – and I never would have been this confident! I want this for you as well.

What things do you want to do but stop in your tracks because of someone else’s filter affecting you? Changing you? Stopping you from being you? What can I do to support you in changing that?

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Stopping the guilt

How often do we guilt ourselves about the things in front of us?

The cookies in the staff room, the cake at the party, the cheese on our taco…

I have had an unhealthy relationship with food for a large part of my life. I eat my feelings, I am over weight, under nourished, and often guilt myself out of eating what I want because I don’t think it is what I “need”.

Today is my mom’s birthday. I knew there would be cupcakes in the staff room. I knew we would be encouraged to eat them, and I knew that I would want one. I dreaded eating it. I have been eating healthier options, smaller portions, and upping my hydration. So eating a cupcake the size of Texas was not in line with what I had been wanting to do for my health.

But you know what – I ate the fucking cupcake.

I ate it because I wanted to. Because I knew that cupcake was worth the calories in. I knew that celebrating my moms birthday was worth more than my waistline. I do not want to guilt anyone who counts calories, diets, or overall wants to watch what they put into their body. I am a track and field and cross country coach, a preschool teacher, and a mom. I know the importance of being careful what you put into your body. I also know the importance of your mental health when it comes to taking care of your body.

So – why do we feel guilty when we do something/eat something/buy something that we want?

Because we are programmed to feel that way. To not accept pleasure. To give more than we take. To please others.

I want to stop the guilt – not be a stone cold jerk – but – Eat the cake, or buy the dress, or go to the movies alone because we want to be alone – or say no to plans that don’t work for us. At the end of the day – being happy – truly happy – is so much more important than a number on the scale, the calories consumed – or the balance in our bank account.

So what can we do to stop this guilt?

For me, it means scheduling things I love. I go get my nails done every few weeks- no polish – just a naked manicure, cleaning my cuticles, a 30 minute period where someone else is taking care of me.

It means signing up for races I want to run and then doing them – no matter what my time will be, no matter how little prep time I have because of life.

It means going out with friends once a month, continuing to sing in the group I love, and coaching track and cross country because I love helping others.

And every now and then – it means eating the cupcake.

What do you do to lessen your guilt, and increase your happiness.

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A princess in running shoes…if only for a weekend


Flashback to October of 2018

Me: hey – what do you think about me doing the Disney Princess AHlf Marathon Weekend fairytale Challenge?

Steve: um – What?

Me: I mean it – I want to train and go. Some of my friends will be running, and I want to do it.

Steve: Are you going to train for it?

Me: duh – of course I will! (I hope)

Steve: you know what sure – Happy Anniversary! (Buys plane ticket and race ticket)

Me: Thank you so much!!! I am so going to do all the things and make you proud!! Maybe even PR

Steve: you better train for this! 

Me: of course!

Life: (snickering in the background…) Hold my beer

Well – that’s how it felt. I started training with a few walk/run/walk training sessions, and my back started spasming. BAD. And I couldn’t walk. So I started PT, and I was ready to start running, and then, our family had a tragedy – I am not going to share the details – they aren’t mine to share. I will say that our oldest got sick, and needed hospitalization for a time, and I could’t train through it. He is and will be ok. I just couldn’t train – and it showed.

Here I was two weeks out from the race – with maybe 15 total miles of training under my belt. BUT I had made some huge lifestyle changes. Sleeping better, drinking more water, eating a little bit healthier. Not anything earth-shattering, or unobtainable – just the subtle changes. 

So race weekend comes.I stepped on a scale the day before I left – the HEAVIEST I HAVE EVER BEEN in my life – even with all the changes. 

I walked up to the starting line of the 10K feeling like an imposter. 

Was I pretending to be someone I wasn’t anymore? Could I really do this? What was I thinking?

Then – a video came on about the Children’s Miracle Network – the hospital charity that the Disney races work with. And the emotions of the past year came flooding in. 

I was openly sobbing at the start line, and people were noticing. A woman who was near me put her hand on my shoulder, and said – you can do this – and you will. I was so afraid that I was letting others down – I forgot that the person I was running for was me. 

The only person I would let down is myself. 

I would do this. 

I could do this.

And you know what?

When I flipped the script – I did.

The 10K was easier. 

I really love the 10K distance. Long enough to feel like an accomplishment – but you don’t feel like your legs weigh a million pounds after. 

I was able to run (jog)-walk- run(jog) the whole race. There was fun music, people cheering each other on, and the fun of running through the Epcot countries, and the Boardwalk/Yahtch/Beach walkway. The drum line at the end gave a good beat and helped me to want to move faster – be stronger. I was 8 minutes off of my PR Time, and grateful that I didn’t push too hard. 

The half was a completely different story. 

I was ready mentally – I thought, but- I knew physically it would be a battle.

I started really strong – probably way too fast – but strong. There was a pacer in front of me – and they were doing 30 seconds run – 30 seconds walk. I stayed with them for the first 2 plus miles – that is 28 minutes of pacing that helped me start the race and helped me to finish.

I stopped between mile 2 and 3 to help a woman who fell – and probably broke her ankle. we called for medics – got her off the course – and they eventually told me to go. so I started running again – without the pacer group – and just followed along as others were run/walk/running their way to the castle!

I was still smiling here because I was just shy of the 10k mark. After the 10K mark – we were on our way back to Epcot. It was a long road- with very little spectators, and it was getting hotter. I had my headphones – my new playlist – and I was just trying to run/walk/run as much as I could. I knew I was close to the 16 minute per mile mark, and I needed to just keep moving.

I started to taper off at mile 9. That was my wall. I got up the hill to mile 11 and just cried, I didn’t think my body would make it. I honestly almost quit. but then I remembered that at the other end was a group of women who pushed me to be here – who believed in me – and I could do 2 more miles. I cried through it – but – at 28 minutes longer than my first half marathon – I finished.

Running for me has always been about personal accomplishment. I ran these races for me – but I also ran these races for my dad – who gave me the running bug – my family who believed in me – and my athletes who I believe in. Also – for the women at the finish line. What do you do for you?

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A Year in the making…aka fighting through the tears

People often post what a difference a year makes. But – it isn’t until you experience such a year that you truly understand how a year can change everything. 

It isn’t so much the dates, the travel of time, but rather, the collection of events that make up that year. 

One year ago today, I was just returning home from travel. I had gone on a one week cruise, and then the day after returning from that, I had driven to South Carolina by myself for a training for my business a the time. I then drove over night by myself to get home, and was awake for 25 hours – I don’t recommend this. 

So of course, on the Monday when I was feeling ill, I assumed I had caught a bug. I upped my fluids, took some vitamin C, and went to bed early. The next morning I woke up with a fever. Not a large one – or so I thought. 

When my body was shaking, and my neck was so stiff I couldn’t turn my head, I knew I needed to panic – a little. 

I went to the doctor, and turns out I had a fever of 103- too high for an adult. And the combination of fever, stiff neck, and overall malaise led me to earn a trip to the ER. When I waited for 4 hours with chills to be seen. 

2 failed spinal taps, more blood draws than I remember, 3 MRI, one MRA, and several doctors later. I left the hospital with a diagnosis of A-Septic Meningitis. 

11 days in patient, in a bed, unable to move takes more of a toll on your body than you realize. 

I had a walker, and had PT to relearn how to walk. I had zero balance or stability for the first few weeks. It took 2 months – but I was almost back to normal walking at that point. and as a runner – this was hard to deal with.

I dove back in to coaching my track and field athletes, teaching little minds at the preschool, cooking food for my family, and closing my business. Before it was even a thing – I Marie Kondo’d my life. 

The after ripples are there. My memory still isn’t 100%, and every once in a while I have a tremor in my weakened right hand, and I have one more follow up with the neurosurgeon to be sure the “bent vein” in my brain is not an Aneurysm. Those things are so trivial compared to where I was one year ago. I was telling my family my wishes, loving my children, and having long talks with my husband about what I wanted for each of them. I DO NOT remember most of my inpatient stay – just bits and pieces sewn together like a movie on the silver screen. 

I was so discouraged, but then so hopeful. Medication started to work, PT made me stronger, and I had a fighting spirit in me to do more – to be more – to help others do the same. 

Today – one year later, I am in possession of 3 medals from two races this weekend. One for the 10K I ran on Saturday, and one for the Half Marathon I ran on Sunday – the other – a medal for completing the challenge of running both races. 

These races weren’t easy, and they definitely don’t define all of me – but – they did remind me how much I love to run – how good I feel when I complete a race – and the camaraderie of runners. As I defined on Facebook hours after the race – A runner is a different breed of human. 

A year of fighting with my body – working through the pain and the tears – being unabashedly selfish. Doing the things I needed to do for me, my family, my health – to be sure we have the time together we want to have – those are the things I have done to make things better for us. 

For me

Because it wasn’t until months later I truly realized that I almost died – and through almost dying – I realized the things that made me want to live – that I live for – that bring me Joy – and I made room for them.  All of them. 

I intend to keep running – and find a way to make my running mean more for others – sharing this story is a huge part of it. 

Want to hear about my races – find those here:

And – today – I am signing up for 2 more races – and will be completing this race again next year! Want to join me? stay tuned!

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Surviving

Author note – I wrote this a year ago – and I was afraid to hit publish who am I to talk about survival – but – I did survive – I am publishing today as a part of the story I tell a year out – A look at my fresh memories here – and the recent Memories here -also – a look at who I am here – 

~~~~

The other side of Survival…

As a mom, heck as a woman, often times we get ill, and don’t do anything about it.
We think to ourselves it is just a cold, or the flu, or upset stomach and we do nothing about it. Sometimes- we don’t even do the resting we need to fully recover.
In February of this year(2018), I was blessed with an amazing month of travel. It started with the LuLaRoe Cruise. 7 nights on a ship with my husband, and so much training for my business. It was a dream vacation, and I loved every minute of it!
Then I got home, and drove from Rhode Island to South Carolina, for the Facebook Live Sale training that LuLaRoe offered. I drove there to save money, and drove home rather quickly.
I say all this to preface the “I am just tired/rundown/its the flu” that lead up to my very serious illness.

FULL DISCLOSER – My illness was not caused by this travel.

I got home from South Carolina, and I still had mild vertigo from the cruise. Then I gathered a headache, then I started to get a stiff neck…then the fever. I assumed it was the flu. So- the Monday feeling was- I just need a nap and more fluids, It must be the flu…
Tuesday morning was when the neck stiffness started, and it just got worse, so – by noon I called the doctor, made an appointment, and went in. For some reason I packed a bag – Just clothes, headphones, chargers, and toiletries. I guess I always pack a “just in case” bag. Deep down I was scared.

My doctor took my temp, and said – you aren’t going home…the rest is a blur… 9 days inpatient, MRI, MRA, Ct, X-ray, 2 Spinal Taps, Gallons of blood (or so it felt), crappy hospital food,  basic TV, missed Track events, hours alone, 3 days of isolation, Home with a walker, and home confinement,  no driving,  4 meds,  learning how to walk, trying to be a mom, rebuilding my business, self care, and being a wife, a friend, a sister, a daughter…I almost died…

I almost died…

That is the hardest thing to think about – because to me – I was just in pain. As each scan happened, incidental things would show up, blood work had a few flags. Nothing scary came back – in the end – Meningitis – which would have killed me if I had stayed on the couch and believed it was just the flu.

Now I don’t write this to scare you – but to talk about how surviving this scary ordeal was something I had to embrace. I had to admit I was sick, Admit I needed help, Go through the scans, and tests, and USE the freaking walker, and Allow all of our friends and family to bring us food, and I had to follow doctors orders and rest. For a month I was in bed by 6, and walking up and down the stairs was exhausting. I am now just over two months into recovery – two months into my new life, and I have discovered that survival, recovery, listening, take time.

My mindset was “It isn’t cancer. or It isn’t an aneurysm, or it wasn’t a car accident…But the reality is – I had to accept that I was sick, that I survived, and that I am in recovery.

What have you survived, and how did you recover?  What would you suggest to others to help them cope?

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A Numbers Game

What do numbers mean to you

Numbers

What are these little things we see everywhere?

Numbers

They create a sense of accomplishment,

A sense of self

A sense of self worth.

Value

Place

Location

Numbers define our lives more than we realize.

Our income

Our debt

Our giving

They define our self

Our weight

Our height

Our clothing size

They define our home

How much

What area

How many rooms

They define our accomplishments

What place

What grade point average

How many followers we have

How many likes we get.

But why do we give numbers so much worth in our lives?

 

Because we learn to from the moment we are born. As a mother, I can remember the first questions I would be asked about my pregnancies. What is your due date? How far along? How many weeks? How long until you know the gender? How many are there? How many will you have? All of these questions require a value, a number.

Then, once you have your child, the first things people want to know about a baby are their height and weight. (Numbers)

Then time and date (numbers)

Then weeks/months/years (numbers)

How many words? (Numbers)

We are measured by numbers from the very beginning. We learn that these numbers hold value. They define who we are. People see us as the skinny or fat baby, the tall or short child, the rich or poor person based on numbers.

 

We try so hard to change these numbers. To make them different. To make them better. Being better or best means having the highest or the lowest number (depending on what you are talking about). Being better or the best means comparing yourself to others. We should always caution ourselves from being too quick to compare ourselves to others. When we do that to our children we can create a world of hurt.

As a mom, I often find myself saying that the first or the second or the third child did x, y, or z at such and such an age. Then, I find myself saying this to another parent when we compare our children. It is like a three ring circus of “well, my child was walking at 10 months old. How about yours?” And “Oh! Well, my child could read at the age of 2.” Followed quickly by an occasional, “Well, my child was playing Mozart at three.” And so on. It really makes me sad to think I have done that about and to my children. I Am trying not to do that anymore. I try to use names and their character to describe them, but sometimes that is hard in a society of numbers.

Motherhood and life are filled with so many numbers. At one point in my own life running seemed like a good idea. How hard could it be, right? So, I signed up for a 5K. I never practiced, never warmed up, and just showed up to run. I came in last place. It took me 47 minutes to run that 5K and it was the most grueling 47 minutes of my life. Those numbers have improved drastically over time with focus, practice, and dedication.

Why did that bother me? Because I let that get to me. I let those numbers give me value. I have learned that those numbers only hold value in that they pushed me to run faster and farther, and to understand that it takes practice to improve my running numbers.

As parents we wanted to choose a sport for our boys that would help them find their values: hard work, dedication, teamwork, good sportsmanship, etc.. The sport we chose for them is all about the numbers : track and field.Aaron Running

Talk about numbers, this sport is about how fast, what place, and how far. We chose it because the one thing I did learn from that race was that I could better myself from that time. Track & Field is a sport that doesn’t compare you to someone else. Well, it doesn’t if you do it right. As coaches and parents we are constantly telling our runners to do THEIR best. Not to worry about the other runner’s best, but to focus on what they can do to beat themselves. We push them in practice to stretch, run, jump and throw better every time. This dedication has lead to personal bests for many of our runners, and even a showing at the Junior Olympics.

The numbers here show our runners that they have grown. That their hard work is paying off. That dedication and focus will lead to great rewards. This lesson is not just for running or jumping or throwing, but it will play out in life.

If they focus on the task at hand, do what they have learned to do and dedicate themselves to it, they will find that they are capable of growing at any task.

Numbers. They mean so much, but also, so little.

Love yourself!A number can never compare to the worth a person feels inside. The sense of accomplishment and wonder someone feels as they rise above a challenge and grow from it. No number can ever replace that feeling.

So I challenge you. Move forward with fewer numbers. Credit yourself for what you can do, and find your non-number worth. What makes you fully you? How do you find your non-number worth? For me, it is how happy my children are, what they believe they can do, the joy in my marriage, and what I know I am capable of. Numbers do not need to define any of that!

be free to love yourself for you

Leave a comment and help others find ways to find their worth as well

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How to Make Videos seamless in Instagram Stories!

How I make Videos for Instagram Stories!

I absolutely love that you can use just about any form of Social media to share your story! You all know I love YouTube
One of my favorite ways to connect on a more personal level is through Instagram story videos. This platform is a short quick glimpse into your daily activities! They disappear after 24 hours, unless you feature them, and are a great way to share Purposeful content, Personality content, and even Promotional content!
Several people have asked me how I do this, and I wanted to share my magic!

Step one – I record a video like the one you see here. I want to post it to Instagram Stories!

 

Step two – I edit if it is necessary using my in phone editor. You can utilize any type of video editor before you upload – I find that unedited videos work best for IG Stories because they are more real.

instagram story cut

Step three – I upload the video into an app called CutStory – CutStory will splice your video for whatever platform you are using it on. Facebook/Instagram/snap chat/whatsap, or you can make custom cuts. you end up with a camera roll that looks like this – wonky face and all!

instagram story videos

 

Step four – The hardest step – Post in stories. You need to carefully select one post at a time, and watch it. That is the only way to be sure you have continuity. Instagram stories are always a little choppy, but- utilizing patience, and adding your own personality will make for a seamless looking IG story that tells your story!

instagram story video clips

Whether you are selling something, sharing a fun event, or an interesting part of your day – this is a great way to make your videos stand out! AND you can enjoy the moment by recording a video, and editing and posting it at your leisure!

What would you use Instagram story videos for?

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come blog with me!

Come blog with me and learn from the people who taught me!
One of my favorite things to do is to write down my story. Blogging is a natural platform for that. I love sharing with you all here, and- I am always looking for ways to provide value to you!
If you have a business, a story to tell, or you are seriously interested in creating a blog and utilizing it – I would strongly recommend that you check out Blogging Boot Camp! It is an intense blog set up course that will take you from no blog- to a set up and structured blog with guidance and support for the 8 weeks! 
I did this one year ago, and not only developed a blog, but also, learned skills for my visuals, editing, and how the basics of the blog works so that I can make minor adjustments as needed without help. It is a decent amount of work, but – so worth it!
blogging is the top of the social media chain, and truly can be used for any aspect. I have utilized blogs for recipes, how to’s, sharing personal information, and inspirational stories!
I wanted to share this information here for any of you who may be on the brink of a blog. It is a significant investment- but an investment that will adapt to your needs, fulfill your creative void, and lead you on a journey to discover yourself and others! 
Do you want to come blog with me?
Ask any questions you may have!
 

Sassy Suite Blogging Boot Camp